Off Topic!!

I’m writing about travel, my aspirations and something I feel hold me back right now. Because this is my blog and life is not all about weight loss!!

I really love to travel. Travel is something that has always been a love for me. If I had the money and the ability to be off work that long, I would love to travel for a year. I gave up on the “gap year” dream a long time ago though. I decided that I’m just going to do a week or two at a time.

In highschool I went to the UK. I went to London and we drove around England with stops in Wales and in Scotland.

In 2012 I spent 2 weeks in Japan. One week in Tokyo and one week in Kyoto.

Now I’m debating on what to do. I’m a big lover of Disneyland. It actually is something I am quite passionate about. I know a lot of facts, random trivia, and regularly help my friends and co-workers plan trip there! So I would really like to go back there again, but I’ve been to Disneyland 5 times now, and Disneyworld once, so I almost feel guilty about going again, instead of going somewhere new.

I was also thinking maybe I could do another 2 weeks in Asia, starting in Hong Kong, then to Shanghai or Beijing, moving to Seoul, and finishing in Tokyo before heading back to Canada. Or I could do a bit or Europe starting in Amsterdam, heading to Munich, then to Belgium, then back to Amsterdam. Both would be so fun.

I have plans for this year, Toronto soon , then Hawaii, then Mexico (Begrundgingly Mexico)

I also have some possible plans for next year. Disneyland in April, Disneyworld in September. But I’m starting to feel like that may be a waste of money… I’m not sure.

Here is where I start to feel confused, I am 28 years old, and I live with my Mom. Yup I said it…. Though anyone who actually reads this already knows that ha ha. I would very much love to move out, but I have some debt and bills holding me back.  Unfortunately I have too much debt to power through it. Even if I put every spare cent I had towards it I would still have to pay it for over a year and a half to pay it off. I refuse to give up my life for a year and a half. It it would take me 6 months or 3 months, then hell yes! I would completely pay off my loan, not spend money on anything at all. But I can’t give up everything for that long.

Now the reason this is an issue is because I had been looking into purchasing a condo this year. I was ready to go, I had organized a down payment, I had started looking, I had a mortgage broker and a realtor lined up….. and then I got screwed. There is something where I live that is an insurance for high ratio mortgages, this means that my down payment is smaller than 20%. One of the regulations is that I cannot add my pre existing debt into my mortgage. So that ended that dream. There is no possible way for me to afford to pay a mortgage and to pay my loan.

This all steps in the way of my travel dreams because I feel this guilt, and shame, because I should be focusing my money on paying my debt, and saving my money for a down payment so that I can move out and become a successful adult, especially since I know that my Mom would like to sell her house in a  couple of years and she would like to downsize, which means no room for me.

I would love to have no debt, and the amount of debt I have isn’t even huge, but my other bills take so much that I am unable to add extra money to my loan.

This makes me wonder, what are my bills? Why are they so expensive, and what can I do to change that?

I wish that I could win a small amount of money in the lottery. I don’t need the jackpot, I just need a little bit to kill my debt. I know that there is more to life than that, and that money doesn’t solve lifes problems, but it sure is standing firmly in my way.

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